Saturday, September 6, 2008


I almost had to have a "Where do Babies Come From?" talk with the boys. They were in the back seat of the van last night kicking each other in the privates and laughing. I said, "Don't do that if you ever want to be a Daddy someday." What a dumb thing to say.

"Why? Why not kick balls if you want to be a Daddy?" And I have no idea where they got the term "balls"--probably from their Daddy--because I never use that word with them, but I am not about to say, "Actually, it's called a scrotum."

"Because Daddies keep something special in there that helps them to make a baby."

"How do Daddies make a baby? Do they poop something out or do they grow it in their buttocks?"--Yes, the emphasis was on the second syllable, and no, I don't know the origin of their usage of this particular word either.

"No, Daddies don't grow babies, only Mommies do. But Daddies help."

"This is confusing. How can something in Daddy's balls help a Mom make a baby?"

"Well, you know how a chicken lays an egg, and the rooster has to fertilize it." They know this from hanging out at Mom and Dad's. "Well, Mommies have tiny eggs and Daddies have to fertilize them."

"So they both poop at the same time..."

"This has nothing to do with poop. Just don't kick each other in the balls--ok?"

Sorry to bring back the potty humor--but I couldn't let this one go. Here's another car conversation:

Daniel says, "I have a joke! VILLAGE PUB! Isn't that funny Mommy, Village pub!"

"I don't really see how that's very funny."

"Why isn't it funny?"

"Well, usually, a joke has a punch line, maybe a pun on another word, or it tells a story. Maybe something funny can happen inside the village pub--that might be funny."

"Well, Mommy, I know something else that might be funny."

"What's that?"


"No Daniel, that's not really that funny."

"But yes it is because something funny happens inside the intestines--POOP--and intestines lead to the bottom where poop comes out."

"No, that's not really funny." And then I had to tell him about how intestines are a part of God's design for ridding our body of waste after we have absorbed the nutrients from food. But how to get him to understand how to make a joke?

So that one actually happened about a year ago, but it seemed worth relating again.


Emily said...

Actually, I think Village Pub is kind of funny

Elizabeth said...

um, sorry, i think the got cuttocks, with emphasis on the second part of the word from my kids. they think it´s the funniest word in the world, right next to poop. in fact they oten chant "kick me in the buttocks!" one day i will and they´ll be sorry they chanted it! let me know if you resolve the joke telling, sebastian is horrible at it and thinks he´s the world´s gif to comedy. nothing worse than a bad comedian with hubris.